New Year's Capitulations

After almost five decades of making New Year's resolutions, I have decided to take a different approach this year.  I am going to make some "New Year's Capitulations."  A "capitulation" is the opposite of a "resolution."  These are the goals that I am going to officially give up, surrender, and  cease worrying about/hating myself for not achieving.  This might sound like a depressing exercise, but it isn't.  My theory here is if there are fewer things to worry about, I might actually worry less.  Hey, it's worth a try...

So here we go:

1.  Stop trying to lose that last 10 pounds of excess weight:  My body likes that little blanket of fat. No matter what I do, it sticks to me.  The only time I lost it was when I prepped for my colonoscopy. I am just going to learn to love my chub.
2. Forget about becoming fluent in a foreign language:  I lost my chance to gain this skill in a natural way when I failed to pursue the goal in my school days days or during my time living overseas.  It takes work, focus and determination. Hell, I am 58 years old!  Those are limited resources at this stage in my life.  Punt.
3. No hit records for you, buddy:  I used to think that my silly song-writing and blues band shenanigans could actually lead to a song that broke into the public consciousness and made money!  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  What a delusion!  So I will just goof around with music for my own amusement.  Let other, more talented people strive for musical fame; I am giving up.
4. No sub-4 hour marathon; in fact, no more marathons, period:  I managed to stumble through the Chicago marathon in 4 hours 20 minutes back in 1992.  I thought I was the next Alberto Salazar.  I set the goal for breaking 4 hours, then gradually improving my performance until I was at the front of the pack in my age group.  Well, I never ran another marathon and my knees scream at me if I run more than 2 miles.  Time to officially stop thinking about this unimportant, unattainable goal.
5. No CEO job:  I was the CEO of a small company for a short time and it was the worst experience of my working life.  In spite of that, I kept thinking that being the top banana is a worthy goal.  It ain't gonna happen, and that's a good thing, because I am a lousy CEO.
6. Give up on the idea of having a successful marriage:  I have spent most of my adult life married, to two different women.  It seemed like these marriages started out pretty well, but after a while my spouses started to detest me. I am currently unraveling my second marriage.   I am still in favor of marriage, but I don't seem to be cut out for it.  I will stick to friendships from now on.
7. Inner peace? Fuhgedabowdit!!:  I have no idea what "inner peace" means, exactly, but my interior life is a bubbling pot of weirdness.  Meditation or cups of tea or large quantities of adult beverages have no impact on this. Time to face it - turmoil will be in my heart forever.

Dropping these seven items still leaves me plenty of stuff to pursue.  I hope that I will move a little more nimbly by dropping some baggage.  

Happy New Year!!

Christmas Eve/2008 Wind Down

Heh, heh....Merry Christmas. The weather has been very evil here is Chicago. We had a goodly amount of snow this month, then temps dived to 8 below, then we had more snow and temps got above freezing, turning the snow to slush. Now we are back down in the teens and the neighborhood is a vast ice skating rink. It is "survival of the fittest" weather.

I just said goodbye to my pregnant daughter and son-in-law. We had a very nice British Christmas Eve meal - roast beef, Yorkshire pudding, roasted root veggies and apple pie with ice cream. I am quite full, facing a kitchen full of dirty dishes.

On December 19, the Mystery Band had its last gig of the year at C.J Arthurs in Wilmette IL. We did not fill the house - the weather was awful - but the music was magical. In the words of my guitar player, The Fret-burner, "When we make the music right, it is better than an orgasm." True words. We had to recruit a drummer at the last minute, Brian T. Brian plays with Koko Taylor; he was in the horrific auto crash that injured Koko's entire band last summer. Brian is still limping; can't put his full weight on his leg (it was severely fractured in the wreck). Brian is a monster drummer, bad leg or no bad leg. Darryl Coutts sat in on keyboards, so the Mystery Band had a lush, exciting sound. It was a great way to end our year of performances. Too bad we didn't have a couple hundred people in the audience.

This past year was very unusual. The U.S. elected an African American president - and a liberal, to boot! The credit markets locked up and the world has plunged into a "Great Recession." Like many people, I am much less wealthy than I was a year ago. But I really don't care that much - easy come, easy go, right? I am heading south for a few days to defrost and won't be back in the frozen U.S. heartland until New Years Day. So Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanzaa and Happy New Year. I will be back atcha in 2009.